I am in Los Angeles working with my Master Coach. I travel out here 3-4 times per year, to work with her in person with our Mastermind group. These experiences always take us to places that we can’t access by ourselves. We never know exactly what we are going to do, but we always get exactly what we need. There are 9 of us – sharing, laughing, challenging, crying, making big decisions, being pushed out of our comfort zones, calling bullshit on each other, while creating the safest space to imagine and cultivate the best versions of ourselves. It’s powerful. It’s uncomfortable. It’s exhausting. It’s one of the greatest gifts that I give myself every couple of months.
Today’s work involved visualizing our dream life. Ok cool, I thought – this will be easy. In so many ways, I feel like I am already living my dream, but I was encouraged to go deeper, dream bigger. But in order to do so, we had to start with writing down every single concern that we have on sticky notes. Right away, I came up with a couple of concerns and problems that I face. I created 5 sticky notes. Great, again that was easy. But then the concerns kept showing up and before I knew it, I had a least 25 sticky notes littering the table in front of me. As I looked at the pile in front of me, I realized that I was staring at all my blocks, limiting beliefs and blindspots. There they all were staring back up at me, daring me to challenge them.
In that moment, I realized that this is exactly how far my life would go if I kept all 25 of those concerns with me every day – this would be as good as it would ever get. And yes my life is good, but I do actually want so much more of the good. To dream bigger, to actualize more – I would have to face these concerns and then let them go. There is no negotiating this one. I can’t have a dream to help more clients while also having a limiting belief that I do not have enough time. I can’t have the dream of teaching my daughter how to meet her own needs, if I have any blocks about how to do that for myself. I can’t have a dream about having more abundance in my life if I have concerns and focus on all the things that I lack. I can’t be a confident public speaker if I believe that I don’t know how to book speaking engagements.
I spent the rest of the day shining the light on my concerns and they kept coming to me – I probably created a total of 40 sticky notes of concerns by the end of the day. It felt so good to be honest about them, share them with the group and not be judged for them. And to realize that I spend a lot of time sending myself mixed messages – and continuing with the mixed messages just will never work. I can’t grow while holding myself back. I can’t say I can and I can’t at the same time. Enough is enough. 40 concerns went in the trash.
So, heading into day 2 of our time together, I feel lighter and unburdened. Today, I can really begin to focus on visualizing my dream life without the confusion of my concerns getting in the way. I can’t wait to see what I imagine up for myself. Blindspots, limiting beliefs and concerns are not invited.