Sometimes I just can’t make sense of myself.
I forget what I am doing.
I get really distracted.
I say one thing and actually mean something else.
I decide, then change my mind, then re-decide, then change my mind again.
And so on.
I say “no” a lot.
And I’m pretty sure that I seem very confusing to everyone around me.
Then other times, I am really efficient.
I’m organized for my day.
I’m on time.
I have clear intentions and I follow through.
I create everything on purpose.
I am unstoppable.
I accomplish small things and I accomplish big things.
Time is on my side.
Anything is possible.
So, what is really going on here?
How can I be one person and have such diverse ways of behaving in my life?
The answer is simple and complicated.
It’s feelings. The answer is always – feelings.
Everything we do or don’t do is based on how we feel.
I will say that again just to really make a point here.
The way we behave and the action we take (or don’t take) is based on how we feel.
Feelings drive all of our actions.
If this is how it works, then it becomes imperative that we are able to identify what we are feeling to understand our behavior.
Which leads me to the question that we can always ask ourselves.
Why am I doing / not doing ________ right now?
And the answer always has to be a feeling.
It is not always easy to locate that feeling. But that feeling is the source of all our action or inaction. And that feeling is always the only answer.
If you can figure out what you feel and understand it is the reason you do or don’t do something, then you are getting to close to understanding yourself and taking responsibility for yourself.
If you want to ask yourself the question: Why am I doing / not doing ________ right now?
The answer will never sound like these:
I have to.
They are expecting me to do this.
I made a promise.
He will be mad at me if I don’t do this.
What will they say if I do it?
She wants me to.
This is a waste of my time.
I don’t know how to do this.
What will they think if I don’t do it?
I can’t wait to get started.
These answers are all thoughts. They are not feelings.
The correct answer to your question will be one-word answers like this.
Because I feel…
Feelings tell you EVERYTHING. They tell you exactly what is going on in your mind and the thoughts that you are creating. They explain your behavior and give you the control to makes changes in what you do/don’t do. Your feelings are your responsibility. No one else creates them. And you get to feel whatever you want. It is just so important to understand that everything you do and don’t do, is based on a feeling. That is powerful.
So, as you head into this week, can you get curious about your behavior?
Can you notice what you are doing or not doing?
How are you acting? Or reacting?
Then ask yourself the question. Why am I doing / not doing ________ right now?
Find the answer inside your feelings. What does that feeling tell you about you? What thoughts are creating that feeling? Do you like the feeling? Do you want to keep the feeling? Do you want a new feeling? Are others thoughts available to you that will inspire a new feeling?
You always have way more power and control over things that you think you do, so get comfortable with connecting to what you are feeling. It will tell you everything you need to know about yourself. And from there, you can decide to stay the course or make changes if you want to be behaving and acting in a new way. The choice is always yours.
And I know that 2 minds are always better than 1 – so if you would like help in learning how to more easily access your feelings to determine your actions – book a complimentary Breakthrough Session today. This is no-obligation conversation where I can help you uncover what feelings might be blocking your productivity and organization. Let’s work together to help you implement this powerful question into your life!