Visualize my Dream Life

I am in Los Angeles working with my Master Coach. I travel out here 3-4 times per year, to work with her in person with our Mastermind group. These experiences always take us to places that we can’t access by ourselves. We never know exactly what we are going to do, but we always get exactly what we need. There are 9 of us – sharing, laughing, challenging, crying, making big decisions, being pushed out of our comfort zones, calling bullshit on each other, while creating the safest space to imagine and cultivate the best versions of ourselves. It’s powerful. It’s uncomfortable. It’s exhausting. It’s one of the greatest gifts that I give myself every couple of months.

Today’s work involved visualizing our dream life. Ok cool, I thought – this will be easy. In so many ways, I feel like I am already living my dream, but I was encouraged to go deeper, dream bigger. But in order to do so, we had to start with writing down every single concern that we have on sticky notes. Right away, I came up with a couple of concerns and problems that I face. I created 5 sticky notes. Great, again that was easy. But then the concerns kept showing up and before I knew it, I had a least 25 sticky notes littering the table in front of me. As I looked at the pile in front of me, I realized that I was staring at all my blocks, limiting beliefs and blindspots. There they all were staring back up at me, daring me to challenge them.

In that moment, I realized that this is exactly how far my life would go if I kept all 25 of those concerns with me every day – this would be as good as it would ever get. And yes my life is good, but I do actually want so much more of the good. To dream bigger, to actualize more – I would have to face these concerns and then let them go. There is no negotiating this one. I can’t have a dream to help more clients while also having a limiting belief that I do not have enough time. I can’t have the dream of teaching my daughter how to meet her own needs, if I have any blocks about how to do that for myself. I can’t have a dream about having more abundance in my life if I have concerns and focus on all the things that I lack. I can’t be a confident public speaker if I believe that I don’t know how to book speaking engagements.

I spent the rest of the day shining the light on my concerns and they kept coming to me – I probably created a total of 40 sticky notes of concerns by the end of the day. It felt so good to be honest about them, share them with the group and not be judged for them. And to realize that I spend a lot of time sending myself mixed messages – and continuing with the mixed messages just will never work. I can’t grow while holding myself back. I can’t say I can and I can’t at the same time. Enough is enough. 40 concerns went in the trash.

So, heading into day 2 of our time together, I feel lighter and unburdened. Today, I can really begin to focus on visualizing my dream life without the confusion of my concerns getting in the way. I can’t wait to see what I imagine up for myself. Blindspots, limiting beliefs and concerns are not invited.

Fear wreaks Havoc

Yesterday, I sent out my weekly motivation email to my subscriber list. It was all about fear – that powerful force that often holds us back from realizing our dreams. The email went out at 8:00 a.m. and by 8:10 when I was putting gas in my car, my best friend texted me and said I had a typo. Ugh. Crap.

I had written “fear reeks havoc” when I actually meant to say “fear wreaks havoc”. Immediately, I could feel THE FEAR start to consume me – the fear of being judged by my subscribers for being careless with my content, or even worse, not being smart. Fear that because I made a mistake, then I couldn’t possibly be perceived as a capable and qualified life coach.

Would people unsubscribe?  

Would they write me off?  

Would I go out of business?

I decided I had a choice. A choice with my thoughts. That in every mistake there is also a lesson and I didn’t have to let THE CRAZY FEAR get the best of me. I texted back my best friend and told her that I had just made a decision – that I decided that I used the word “reek” on purpose. Because fear does reek! It smells horrible! It also tastes horrible, looks horrible and feels horrible!

Fear suffocates dreams. Fear keeps us small and safe. Fear blocks us from having everything that we really desire.

By the time I was finished at the gas station, I had shifted my thoughts from fear and worse case scenario thinking to acceptance and best case scenario thinking. It took less than 5 minutes to make that thought shift. Imagine, if I hadn’t done it? I would have spent the entire day in worry and fear about something that might never happen (being judged, losing subscribers, losing credibility). What a waste of a day that could have been!

I share this as a reminder that we all have the power to manage our thinking. If we let it, fear will come in and try to take over, every time. It will try to mess with our minds, delay our dreams and shut down our desires. I want to tell you that it doesn’t have to be that way. Every minute of every day – we all get to control our thoughts, which ultimately create our feelings and inspire the actions and results in our lives. We get to choose what we think.

So the next time that you feel THE FEAR creeping in. Breathe. Check your thinking. Is there a shift that you can make to move you out of fear and into a place of acceptance and compassion? Can you move from fear to love? From that place, you can take inspired action towards your dreams!