Getting Comfortable With Being Uncomfortable.

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I will never forget when my coach taught me this important concept. At first, I was so resist to accepting it. I pushed back. I argued against it until I wanted to make change in my life so badly that I was willing to surrender to the idea. Now I teach my clients the exact same concept. And why do I tell them this? Because it is 100% true.

For most of us, we will do just about anything to not feel uncomfortable. We will resist, push back, avoid, and procrastinate. And then we will become moody and irritable, we will sleep too much, eat too much, drink too much, we will settle and then complain about it…. the list goes on and on. But what are these actions doing to facilitate our growth as human beings? Absolutely nothing.

Let’s face it – change is uncomfortable. Feeling comfortable comes from knowing what to expect, maintaining the status quo and staying within our comfort zones.

Here are some tips to help you move through feeling uncomfortable:

Accept that feeling uncomfortable is part of the process.

If you can learn to be comfortable being uncomfortable, and you’ll experience ongoing growth and success. When it comes to accepting the changes in your life, you need to learn how to feel your fear and then release it. Once you release your negative, scary thoughts, you allow new opportunities to come into your life. The longer you avoid feeling your feelings (discomfort & fear) the longer it will take to eventually release them. And the longer it will take to make changes and move closer to the life you have always wanted.

Create a “feel great” state of being.

Your emotional state is a clue to what you are attracting to your life. If you want to attract more….love, money, adventure, friends – you must release limiting or negative beliefs about yourself. When we are presented with change, our minds automatically think about what we’re giving up, not what we’re gaining. That mindset keeps us in a place of lack rather than moving us into a place of abundance. Instead of focusing on what you may not have right now, focus on what you want.

Ask yourself if you are really willing.

  • Are you willing to trade short-term discomfort for long-term success?
  • Are you willing to stop denying yourself the career, romance, money or wellness lifestyle that you have always wanted?
  • Are you willing to work around inevitable road-blocks in pursuit of your dreams?
  • Are you willing to start believing that you are deserving and worthy of everything that you truly desire?

When you answer “yes” to these willingness questions and embrace the feeling of being uncomfortable – it means you are ready to make change. You are ready to release the resistance, to create a “feel great” state and step into the life that you have always wanted.

Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

When was the last time that you stepped out of your comfort zone and did something unexpected?

It is very easy to play it safe – to stay comfortable and to not risk anything. We like to predict endings. We like to control outcomes. This tendency keeps us within our comfort zone.

The challenge with the comfort zone is that we don’t get to learn anything new about ourselves when we stay there. Our life results are consistently the same, which proves our thoughts about avoiding risk, playing it safe to be consistently the same. The cycle continues.

When we step out of our comfort zones, we enter the area of unknowing. It can test our resiliency and strength. Outside the comfort zone gives our minds new things to think about. Creative problem-solving is activated and our bodies are flooded with new thoughts and feelings and it can be very uncomfortable. And it is also where the vulnerable fun is. Yes, I just said vulnerable fun! Being vulnerable means not having all the answers all the time, not always having to be right, being in uncharted territory, being messy and a little scared. What’s not fun about that? It can be so exhausting and stressful to be so predictable and perfect and comfortable and safe. Being vulnerable means releasing the pressure valve a little bit, letting go and trusting that everything will be ok. It is also an amazing chance to see ourselves in new ways. The chance to fail and try again, the chance to experiment with new belief systems. A chance to grow, evolve and get closer to our dreams.

Being vulnerable invites us outside the comfort zone and into opportunity.

If you feel like the walls around your comfort zone are closing in on you, consider these questions:

  • What are you denying yourself because you are staying in your comfort zone?
  • What dream are you postponing because of a fear of possibly being uncomfortable?
  • How could your life be different if you chose to boldly step out of your comfort zone?
  • What could you learn about yourself if you were willing to choose opportunity?

Staying in your comfort zone is optional. Choosing to step out, means that anything is possible.

Protect Your Yes

Saying yes…

So simple and easy to say.
And it often obligates us. And it can complicate things.

How often do you say yes, when you would actually prefer to say no?

A friend needs a favor and the timing is actually terrible for you, but you don’t want to let them down.
Someone serves you a second helping and you eat it when you are not hungry because you don’t want to be rude.
You purchase something that you don’t actually need and can’t afford, because you are uncomfortable saying no.

Saying yes is too often our default answer and it has the potential to do damage and harm. This simple word can compel us to turn our back on ourselves, because we don’t want to hurt someone else’s feelings or disappoint them. Essentially we would rather hurt our own feelings when we answer with yes, but are thinking no. We give away our precious time, put food into our body that we actually don’t need, or spend money instead saving it for what we really want.

It is possible to protect your yes.

It means slowing down, giving yourself time to consider your answer carefully.

It means having an understanding that saying no may let someone down, but their experience of disappointment is all about them and that they are entitled to feel anything they want to.

It means being willing to be a little uncomfortable with someone’s reaction in exchange for not disappointing yourself.

It means keeping your commitment to yourself in regards to your time, your money or how much you eat.

It means honoring your truth and standing up for yourself.

It means being genuine.

It means not complicating your life with external obligation to others.

Protecting your yes means you are protecting you.